Titus O’Reily on the best strategy for navigating conversations about sport.
Australia’s success in all-things-athletic is built on a nation of zealous sport enthusiasts. Discussing sport tactfully is a skill; if done recklessly, it can lead to catastrophic consequences, such as being excluded from the next round at the pub, or given an end slice of bread at a sausage sizzle (and you can forget about the onions).
As Titus O’Reily explains, ‘sport is the closest thing Australia has to a culture, to the point that even the few Australians who hate sport define themselves by their opposition to it.’
With that in mind, here are his recommendations for the best and worst things to say to the Aussie sports fan.
Romantic things to say to a sports fan
‘One day I hope to make you as happy as your team does, but I also hope to not let you down as often.’
‘Even though the team you barrack for isn’t playing, I know this match is important to you.’
‘My love for you burns as bright as this flare I just smuggled through security soon will.’
‘If it clashes with the footy we should just reschedule it.’
‘We should get a bigger TV.’
‘Why don’t we make our honeymoon a trip to England to watch the Ashes?’
‘I hate the Fanatics too.’
Worst things a person can say
‘Why are you watching this? Your team isn’t even playing.’
‘We’ll get a great rate if we have our wedding on grand final day.’
‘The government should be giving money to health and education, not sport.’
‘Why would you watch a replay of a game you just went to?’
‘Are you just going to sit around and watch cricket all day?’
Can you not like sport and be Australian?Buy now
Titus O’Reily shares the story of the first code of laws for Australian Rules Football.
In Cheat, Titus O’Reily offers a handy how-to guide for the professional athlete in your family.
Historical gambling notes from Titus O’Reily’s Please Gamble Irresponsibly.
Three go-to defence mechanisms for sporting ‘Good Blokes’ who’ve done wrong.
Bestselling Australian author of THE GODMOTHERS explores the joy of writing MARCIE GILL AND THE CARAVAN PARK CAT, her first book for kids.
We’ve all heard of the phenomena that is Diary of a Wimpy Kid and Bluey, but what is it that has made these beloved series so successful?! Here are some of our thoughts..
Our authors and staff recommend these chilling tales for Halloween.
Find the perfect stocking stuffer or gift for a bookworm with our Christmas quiz.
Everybody is raving about Reese Witherspoon's book club — here are the reasons for its success.
Grab a box of tissues because these books are sure to get the waterworks flowing.
Get excited for the TV adaptation of Taylor Jenkins Reid's bestselling novel.
We all want to buy a gift friends and family will love unwrapping this Christmas. Here are five tips for picking a book they'll want to devour.