> Skip to content

Article  •  13 May 2016

 

Borrowing a bus

R.A. Spratt comes clean on the whereabouts of Nanny Piggins.

Dear Readers,

I am afraid Nanny Piggins is unable to write her own blog entry today, because she has been arrested for ‘borrowing’ a bus.

Fortunately she was able to send me a coded message in the form of cookies, baked in the shape of letters from the alphabet. (Apparently the Police Sergeant was kind enough to allow her access to the police station oven as well as large amounts of sugar, butter and flour).

Anyway, Nanny Piggins’ message reads:

Dear R.A.,

Please please please do something about your hair. The last time I saw you, you looked dreadful. If you won’t get it cut, the least you could do is buy a hat – a big one, with ear flaps, to make sure everything is entirely covered. Then when you have done that, get me a lawyer, a good one (ie. Not Mr Green).

Your Glamorous Muse

Nanny Piggins F.P.

I’m sure Nanny Piggins would have gone on to say how sorry she is not to be doing this last blog entry herself, but she ran out of letter-shaped cookies. So thank you to everyone who has read her blog this week. 

If you want to know more about Nanny Piggins’ opinions, attitudes and adventures then don’t wait for her to blog again (It may be some time. The cheeses at Penguin Random House have been muttering words like ‘banned’, ‘unnecessarily hostile’ and ‘disgrace’ when the topic of her blog comes up). So instead you can read my books, I do try to copy down everything Nanny Piggins says verbatim (otherwise she bites my shins).

Kind Regards

R.A. Spratt

P.S.  I’m sure that the rumour Boris started about Nanny Piggins deliberately getting herself arrested so that she would not have to write another blog entry are entirely untrue.

P.P.S. For further information about me or Nanny Piggins you can visit us at raspratt.com

More features

See all
Article
Did you know? Bill Gates reads 50 books a year

Bill Gates, the billionaire founder of Microsoft, credits his hefty reading list for his success.

Article
The Glucose Goddess’ number one trick for dessert without the sugar crash

If you love dessert but hate the sugar crash that follows, this trick is for you. Jessie Inchauspé – AKA The Glucose Goddess – shares her top tip for enjoying sweets, so you can have your cake and eat it too!

Article
Tap into your inner knowing with this super easy exercise

Have a big decision to make? Don’t know which direction to go in your life? Now might be the perfect opportunity to tap in to your inner knowing.

Article
Lynette Noni shares sage advice for developing lifelike characters

Lynette Noni, bestselling author of YA fantasy The Prison Healer trilogy shares how she creates unforgettable characters that feel like real people.

Article
Shirley Marr shares experience as child that inspired new book

‘That memory will stay with me for a long time, it was really touching and something I will always remember.’

Article
Why the Australian outback makes a perfect setting for crime novels

An intro to the bourgeoning genre of outback noir.

Article
We’re giving away a one-of-a-kind Penguin bookcase

... and more (including $1000 cash and $500 worth of books)!

Article
Article
Cop and Robber Reading Group Questions

If your mum was a cop and your dad was a criminal who needed your help to commit a crime, would you do it to save him?

Article
5 key ways to re-establish control of your body and mind after trauma

Bessel Van der Kolk provides some key guidance on how to reclaim your life after trauma in his insightful book, The Body Keeps the Score.

Article
The greatest middle grade books of 2022

Gripping new stories for ages 8–12.

Article
QUIZ: Which Emily Henry book should you read?

If you're a fan of contemporary romance with humour and wit, you've probably heard of Emily Henry - find out which of her novels you should pick up with this handy quiz!

Looking for more articles?

See all articles