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  • Published: 20 November 2025
  • ISBN: 9781529937527
  • Imprint: Ebury Digital
  • Format: EBook
  • Pages: 304

How to Be Selfish

7 steps to taking back your power

  • Suzy Reading



An unapologetic call to learn how to put yourself first, by psychologist and self-care expert Suzy Reading

'The 7 steps to self-love everyone needs to thrive.' – Dr Martha Deiros Collado, bestselling author of How to Be the Grown Up

'How to be selfish is a must-read for anyone buried under the weight of the world's expectations and struggling to put themselves on their own priority list.' – Libby Ward, @diaryofanhonestmum

IT'S TIME TO START LIVING LIKE YOU MATTER TOO

In How to Be Selfish, chartered psychologist Suzy Reading challenges everything we’ve learnt about selflessness, and dispels the widely accepted myths about what it is to be 'selfish'.

Drawing on somatic therapy, neuroscience and psychology, alongside highly effective coaching tools and techniques, Suzy presents seven steps to guide you towards reclaiming your peace and your power. We can only become calmer, stronger, well-rested people by prioritising ourselves and also allowing others to fill up our cup. It is time to receive!

By reclaiming the right to self and honing the skills of self-advocacy, we deepen the authenticity of our bonds, we protect the energy to take care of others and also tend to our own needs and ambitions without depletion.

Understanding the true glory of being able to embrace 'selfishness' is our opportunity to break the cycle of stress and toxic productivity, disrupt patriarchal pressure and transform the way we live, love, work and parent.

'This book is balm for the burnt-out. Wise, clear and compassionate' – Anna Mathur, bestselling author of The Uncomfortable Truth

'An empowering and important book for anyone who has always put themselves last' - Helen Thorn, bestselling author of Get Divorced, Be Happy

  • Published: 20 November 2025
  • ISBN: 9781529937527
  • Imprint: Ebury Digital
  • Format: EBook
  • Pages: 304

Praise for How to Be Selfish

How to Be Selfish is a deeply compassionate and empowering guide to coming home to yourself. With wisdom and warmth, Suzy shows us how easily we lose sight of who we are when we’re shaped by other people’s expectations, and how life-changing it can be to reclaim the right to feel and to belong first to ourselves. This book is both practical and profound - a roadmap back to authenticity.

Emma Reed Turrell, psychotherapist and author of Please Yourself and What Am I Missing?

How to Be Selfish is the book so many of us didn’t know we were waiting for. In a world that continues to idolise burnout, people-pleasing, and self-abandonment, this book gives permission to finally come back to yourself. With compassion, and evidence-based tools, Suzy shows us that reclaiming selfishness isn’t about pushing others away, it’s about deepening our capacity for love, connection, and authenticity. A must-read for anyone ready to stop running on empty and start living from a place of wholeness.

Francesca Olivia, psychotherapist @frankiestherapy

Honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever been as excited for a self-help book release as I am for this one - the world needs Suzy’s wisdom.

Helen Marie, psychotherapist and author of Choose You

If you've ever felt guilty for saying no, or for expressing your needs, you need this book in your life! Written with Suzy's signature warmth and compassion, it will empower you with all the tools you need to start reclaiming the life you deserve. Truly, I feel that every woman in my life will benefit from this beautiful book!

Samantha Hadadi, health coach and author of Hormone Goddess

Right now, so many women are exhausted, running on empty and quietly hitting a wall. Something’s got to give. In a world that constantly demands more, this isn’t just a book; it’s a movement. It’s for anyone who’s learned to be the easy one, who has put selflessness ahead of their own wellbeing. It doesn’t shy away from the hard stuff, like the ways that society tells women to put everyone else first. It’s rare to see these experiences addressed so honestly, yet Suzy tackles them with compassion and clarity. Reading it felt like she was personally giving me permission to slow down, take up space and honour my needs without guilt. Her voice is comforting and wise, wrapping you in a reminder that your worth isn’t measured by how much you give. This is a must-read for anyone who struggles to prioritise themselves, a warm invitation to reclaim your energy, your voice and your life.

Lee McKay Doe @TheCareerTherapist

Suzy is a shining light in the darkness of healing. She is the total embodiment of compassion and empathy in all the work she does. She teaches us all that the smallest of steps make the biggest impact on our journey to self love, inner peace and resilience. I am one of many who hugely benefits from her words, thoughts and ideas.

Laura Belbin, @knee_deep_in_life

Suzy's words of wisdom will guide you, comfort you and empower you to take those vital first steps to reclaiming yourself and living life to the full. This book is like having a best friend, therapist and cheer squad all in one. This book is like a confidence-boosting boot camp! A brilliant toolkit for self-belief and self-worth.

Helen Thorn, comedian, podcaster and bestselling author of Get Divorced, Be Happy

The 7 steps to self-love everyone needs to thrive. Suzy Reading gently walks you through each step so you can stop shrinking yourself to fit in and find the quiet courage to choose yourself, without apology. Selfish isn’t bad, it’s the first step to self-advocacy.

Dr Martha Deiros Collado, clinical psychologist and author of How to Be the Grown Up

The book every woman needs to read. The actionable toolkit to help us honour our true needs. Suzy, you’ve done it again created an icon.

Jessica Shand, registered naturopathic nutritionist and author

This book is a beautiful and powerful reminder that many of the things we call selfish – rest, pleasure, saying ‘no’ – are actually sacred.

Nicola Jane Hobbs, psychotherapist and author of The Relaxed Woman

This book is a game-changer for any women who struggles to prioritise her own needs. Suzy brings a no nonsense, theory driven, approach to enable you to centre your own needs and advocate for yourself in your own life.

Emma Hepburn, clinical psychologist and author of A Toolkit for Modern Life

This book is balm for the burnt-out. Gentle, liberating and deeply validating. A must-read for anyone who has ever struggled with people-pleasing or perfectionism.

Anna Mathur, psychotherapist and bestselling author of The Uncomfortable Truth

This book is like a detox from the conditioning that makes women play small. How To Be Selfish is a reclamation of our needs as a rebellion against the cultural norms that cause us to fragment ourselves. Throughout this book Suzy Reading provides her healing expertise to guide readers from self-abandonment to self-advocacy with tenderness and care.

Tamu Thomas, author of Women Who Work Too Much

You had me at ‘It’s time to start living like you matter too.' Bravo. I will be buying this book for every woman in my life.

Emma Bardwell, registered nutritionist and bestselling author of The 30g Plan