How To Be A Person

"If you're holding this book, standing there at a bookstore, wondering if a book like this is a dumb idea, open it up and you'll soon admit this book is very funny, lacking in all bullshit, and never dumb. If you're holding this book, presuming it to be funny and smart and lacking in bullshit, you will be glad to know it is all those things, but it also tells the truth. About 4 or 5 books a year tell the truth, and this is one of them."
Dave Eggers

"I went into college armed only with a trash bag used as luggage, a boom box held together with duct tape, and a battered 1965 Chevy. I so needed this guide back then. I am jealous of people who have it now."
Sherman Alexie

"Suck it, Proust. This book about stuff is much better than those things you wrote."
Gary Shteyngart

"Don't be fooled by the bitingly funny humor. This guide teaches simple tasks like how to wash socks, make tacos and not commit a heinous mistake on an English paper as well as how to face complicated situations such as deciding whether to experiment with illegal drugs, choosing an area of the United States to call home or coming out of the closet. Reassuring, practical and thorough, How to Be a Person is perfect for any recent high school or college graduate."
Shelf Awareness 

"It could become an underground Bible for all incoming freshmen..."
New York Post 

"This brand-spanking-new book gives funny, no-bullshit advice on the full gamut of college life, from making friends and getting along with roommates to sex, drugs, politics, and, you know, learning stuff about stuff so that you can get a job and hopefully not have to move back home and work at the car wash and ask all the neighborhood high school kids, 'hey, guys, where’s the cool parties this weekend?'"
MamaPop.com