Bloom

Standing in front of 50,000 screaming fans, I just wanted to soak up the moment – it wasn’t that long ago that I thought I wouldn’t be here.

I was playing the best football of my life, having so much fun, but only I knew why. There are so many moments in your life you enjoy sharing with others, but no one knows you like you know yourself. No one has done your journey the way you’ve done it. Being able to tell myself that – to have that voice in my head – has really helped me a lot.

The most fulfilling part about the way I was feeling right then was that it had come from a decision I’d taken just a few months earlier. All these good things – playing in a home World Cup, performing well on the pitch, forming strong new friendships – had come from my decision to cut off the negative energy in my life.

I had become a better version of myself and felt so much lighter about everything. I almost felt invincible. If I was able to get myself through this, I would be able to get myself through anything. It was a really empowering experience. I realised that, for the first time in my life, if everyone in my life walked away, I would still be okay. I would have myself.

When I looked up into the night sky and felt the pull of nature that lives inside of me, I couldn’t help but smile. I relayed an important message to myself: ‘You are here. You are alive. It’s so nice that you stayed.’